Sunday, September 25, 2011

America!

Yeah, America – fuck that place. Now I know judging by common sense the majority of you are from the USA, but bear with me. Here is a quick few things that give me the shits about your silly little nation.

American Sport

No, it is not the ‘world series’ – fuck off. You only call it the World Series because you’re the only fucking country who plays (and gives a shit) about any of it. How about playing and being decent at a sport that other countries play? I vaguely remember our depleted Wallabies running out 67-5 winners over the ‘Eagles’ the other night…and we have 20 million people. I won’t even bring up your excuse for a football team (and not American Football…not even going to start on that stupid mess of a game).

American Politics

I probably don’t even need to explain this one. How about implementing a compulsory election system and you may not end up having some overblown fuckwit babbling to the masses about how you can literally blow in one ear and feel it out the other side. Nice one George Dubya:



American Corporations

What the fuck do these things think they are doing? They are just about single-handedly sticking a burning iron rod up the ass of the entire world by exporting labour and industry, causing immeasurable damage to the environment…exponentially lower wage rates…you name it they have had their part in causing it. Here is a nice fact for you; in 2010 Apple’s iPhone contributed almost 2bn USD to the American trade deficit. Stupid fuckwits – grow your own iPhones.

American Ignorance

[Disclaimer: I don’t agree every America is like this, just the vast majority]. American stupid people sound stupider than any other kind of stupid person – FACT. America also seems to stockpile immense amounts of international and cultural ignorance…no wonder your fucked up political system is like a zoo. These videos really are quite funny, so watch them, now.





To those Americans who fit and/or subscribe to any of these, stop swilling your Bud Light, driving that fucking Hummer and pushing your culture, systems and way of life down the throat of the world. In any case that’s me done for today, I need bourbon.


-Nick

8 comments:

  1. Excellent post. I know you might get a lot of flax for this, but, you're expressing your right to, well, express. Good points and funny videos. I did not read this as a personal attack. You need to keep your eyes opened to what's going on in your country, all of it.

    Nick- You should check out Cracked.com

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  2. P.S. You can find ignorant people everywhere, and edit together a video. Just saying.

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  3. Haha thank you, I do and don't expect to cop flack for this. There will be people defending their country - I do that with Australia, but I do it for actual reasons...not just because I am 'Australian'.

    And yes I know that very well - but as I said, American stupid people sound stupider than any other type of stupid person.

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  4. Oh, these are the very things that shame me to say I'm an American. We've been talking about moving for a while now, and eventually will, but for now we can't afford it and can't abandon our music. *sigh* Until then I can only hope I do this country a little good.

    I have no reason to defend "my country", because it is no longer any of ours. We lost it long ago, along with many basic rights. There are many countries I long to move to, and one day, my dream will come true!

    Great post Loads!

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  5. These jabs and punches are shamelessly spot on. There are good things about America, but sadly, these powerful forces of idiocy seem to dominate air time. I have always believed Bush had an alternative career in stand-up comedy. Just never realized he was going to be President, twice!

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  6. Jez: Australia is always good, we have the national pride and a reason to be proud =P

    Psycho: It was a pity Bush's stand-up career was cut short..a pity for the rest of the world anyway.

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  7. Speaking as an American (and probably related to some of those idiots in the videos), I must must say the following: This blog post is very insulting to America (or as Dubya would say "Amerca"). That being said, this post made me laugh - very funny!

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